After ballet class I had another revelation that the taxis in the street and not as tall as I am, but a taxi with a sign on top can be as tall or even taller than me. Not that I was curious or cared to find it out, but it just dawned on me that the taxis were not so tall. My right eye was leading again, I was relieved of the frustration of looking presentable (as opposed to white sclera instead of the white eye with the iris in the corner) and felt somewhat better after dancing, although not as much better as on some other occasions. I had been frustrated in the dance class and though if my eyes looked together, and I still the leftovers of the anxiety. Before the class I had been trying to consciously direct myself, like to look at the surface of my eyes in the mirror, or to start with the eyes farther away like Peter taught as, and to bring the gaze closer together, and back again, and so forth, so the eyes can get more together. Of course, all this trying to stay present instead of getting overfocused with the desired result. However, now I was feeling more and more relieved from the frustration, and reminded myself that it was almost like night vision, so the right eye will get a different experience when it will lead at this time of the day, not the same as the bright colors of the daylight.
Just like in the previous days, I wanted to spend some hours walking on different streets where I could look at various things so I can experience the growing depth perception, even it was just learning to use the visual cues. By that time it was clear that those visual cues or whatever it was created a really new experience inside me, perhaps through the visual cortex, the experience that does not depend on eyes or vision after it is experienced.
After all, as I was thinking on some days, I am a dancer, I should be able to experience space directly and learn depth perception through a direct experience. Also, I have a Ph.D. in Mathematics, and my thesis was in geometry, about properties of a certain 4-dimensional object. I suspect I could have and maybe had reconstructed some depth perception in my visual cortex through the study and research in advanced geometry. Yet it is stunning, how clueless I had been in my use of the mirror and in my perception of the faces for all these years. Regarding face perception, until a few days ago I had been constantly surprised by seeing the same person from a different angle, and sometimes not being sure if I was indeed talking to the person I thought I was talking to, if this was not a very close acquaintance.
Just like in the previous days, I wanted to spend some hours walking on different streets where I could look at various things so I can experience the growing depth perception, even it was just learning to use the visual cues. By that time it was clear that those visual cues or whatever it was created a really new experience inside me, perhaps through the visual cortex, the experience that does not depend on eyes or vision after it is experienced.
After all, as I was thinking on some days, I am a dancer, I should be able to experience space directly and learn depth perception through a direct experience. Also, I have a Ph.D. in Mathematics, and my thesis was in geometry, about properties of a certain 4-dimensional object. I suspect I could have and maybe had reconstructed some depth perception in my visual cortex through the study and research in advanced geometry. Yet it is stunning, how clueless I had been in my use of the mirror and in my perception of the faces for all these years. Regarding face perception, until a few days ago I had been constantly surprised by seeing the same person from a different angle, and sometimes not being sure if I was indeed talking to the person I thought I was talking to, if this was not a very close acquaintance.
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